i am little miss happy today! (:
because..

1. we played netball today for like 2hours i think. and the girls thrashed the guys madly. and we played really well, good defence and passes. and i managed to put in alot of shots for like the first time in my entire life.

2. jessica/eunice and i had a long talk at the bleachers. okay not really long but still, it's something. (: told her some things that i never told anyone before. so you better be honoured ah twin. we HAVE to get to holland v and feast on something someday during our long break! and we just HAVE to take neos together cos noone seems to see the thrill in taking them anymore ):

3. went to gym even though i didnt feel like cos i was so shagged. didnt work out alot but still it counts. made juin run four pathetic rounds at snail's pace and then his canoeing friends were like 'damn tiring ah.' haha oops.

4. martin was being so SWEET just now! while i was running he was at the bleachers self practising his instrument i think. and he shouted 'girlfriend'! (: so i 'boyfriend'-ed back! haha. so cute. martin read this: I WILL COOK MORE DINNER FOR YOU SOON :D

what you're made of.

i came across my prom pictures again and i cringed maaadly.
they were all so ugly x1000000! ):
what a terrible experience i must not look like that for my grad prom again.
aurggggh.

legs kinda aching.

cos of yesterday's run.

havent done 2.4k in ages, not to mention 3.2k.

i must aim for 4k one day! haha. soon.

; always on my mind.
jessicaaaaa.
hello twin. hellohellohello. i keep having the impression you have an uncontrollable bladder LOL cos we always go toilet together :DD we must have a photo together! someday when i feel like i can do with taking a photo. cos im kinda camera allergic. lol.
enli.
you are so skinny! so dont think otherwise kae. and dont overwork yourself kae i was so shocked when you said you were going to run 7k ytd :O i dont see an ounce of fat on you la woman. loved the mini shopping trip as well as sizzler w you around (: your presence really makes a difference. maybe we shall get emo again one day and sing to the windows again! <3
juin.
yay. my bestest bestest guyfriend. i think i owe you alotalot. for always being there, for being the gentleman that you are. and for that i'l forgive you for your oinkoink nature. and i will not become anorexic thankyou. and yes if i get fitter i WILL go canoe. but i think my motivation to get fit wont last long hahaha.


if it's not what you're made of.
you're not what im looking for.
you were willing, but unable.
to give me anymore.
there's no way, you're changing.
cos some things will just never be mine.
you're not in love this time.
but it's alright.
/ lucie silvas; what you're made of.

goodbye to you.

ive a new twin as of today and she's called jessicagoh aka eunice (:
she's this eunice face la! hahaha.
lao shi always cant tell us apart until recently.
we are both oh-so-lovely, love food, hate getting fat, but are lazy to exercise.
TEEHEE.
and on the first day of our twinhood we already arranged to go hollandv one of these thursdays during our long break to feast :DD
yayy i love that woman.

ive been longing to sit in a carousel.
and i miss the cotton candy days.

certain things i want not to change.
certain things i cannot control.
certain things that are not within my reach.

... not the one.

身边

there were some spca volunteers who came to our schl today.
melody cherilyn aiyun huizhen and i volunteered to help in this fund raising event for spca.
we tried to make them accept leone and noel into spca since they said spca's the only organisation that doesnt reject any kind of animal.
and the five of us contributed a dollar each to the fund (:
what kind souls we are!

because im a girl.

aurgh. im damn irritated now.
about nothing.
laugh, people. laugh.
i know you all like to laugh at the most childish ways i behave.
this makes me realise that people who listen are the most precious people around.
so i thereby proclaim the surviving ones who actually managed to tolerate my rubbish MY ANGELS (:
<3

that's my goal.

i went to juin's cell group for the first time today.
there was another jieying there! teehee.
enjoyed it quite a bit (:
and we're going for cell group dinner next friday!
actually quite looking forward to it.
cos i think juin enli and i are going to marina to shop a little first :D
so i can spend my vouchers then. lol.

i will..
1. do my chem tutorial.
2. read gp package.
3. exercise (haha i bet enli's gna go like. you always say you'l exercise but you end up not exercising)
4. find out what i have to do to juin. they mentioned during cell just now but i forgot.
5. buy shoes.

yes, all by tmr.

i feel really secure in my environment now.
as in.
i feel as if like whatever happens there'l be people who will protect me and help me through the hardest times.
it's a kind of reliance im developing and im not sure if it's a good thing or not.
more of a bad thing, i suppose.

but if there's anything i need most now, it'l have to be this kind of security.

晴天

snippet of my lovely outing out (:


koped from yewseng. SO COOL RIGHT (:


the balloon is freaking pretty thanks to lovely qixin who remembered i love lovely balloons (:


i was looking at my phone and so was she but i look like i was closing my eyes -.-


twentyeight! pooling grounds. so freaking coincidental that we got table 28. a number that was once special to me. oh, qixin too.


the dudes who were there. except yuzheng the melman ):
dont have picts of juin and enli :x but anw they were there too (:

so they were the fantabulous bunch who made my day beautifully complete.

---

school was alright until the very end.
auurrgh.
played frisbee/ volleyb for awhile.
in my uniform lah! darn i think i stank from then onwards.
gsc was kinda hilarious we forced cornelius to the corner so he was the only guy in the entire row.
and lao shi sided me today by telling ayong not to call me bad names cos im pretty.
HAHAHA.
but then she also said before that all her students are pretty in her eyes.

oh at the end of the day i felt so sick and was glad that lessons were over.
so i didnt go np to play netball in the end though i told peilin wld.
sorry babe ): i wished i cld go too but i didnt have the attire nor mood.

i think i might go gym tmr. MIGHT.
i always say i might but i end up not going.
is there any chance that the babes'l be playing netball at np again?
maybe i can drop by.
haha.

okay off to dinner even though im freaking not hungry.
oh i discovered a simple concoction of nutella + icecream cone tastes heavenly.
so now you know why i aint hungry (:

my lovely balloon is a step away from being totally deflated ):

雨都停了 天都亮了 我们还不懂

*edited.
actually i feel guilty for slacking off like hell after knowing everyone's like. mugging.
okay tmr i shall be a good girl and listen during lessons, do my work, exercise, and study. (:
yes i will.

what an angsty fangsty post. that's why i edited it.
ciaoo update another time.
got lotsa homework uhuh.
i love the my pallies. for the wonderful sunday afternn out(:
HUGS.

haiyohh.

haiyohh.
i am so disheartened.
im starting to think my life's monotonously shitifiedd.
tmr we're gna get back math terms. SURE FAIL.
sorry im just pmsing a little.
i think im having lunch w my favourite people on sunday afternn. (:
finally bought squash tee.
i think ms azlina is nice!
mr tan gave us cookies bought from wales and it was superly nice.
walnuts plus double choc i think.
okay byebye im going to do homework and study a little.

过敏.

okay i got back chemistry terms and i think im kinda.. contented.
some people did a little worse than me so im consoled by that (:

the whole day was a little boring.
i died at the some security seminar.
about the army and what not.
terribbly aaaaurgh :/

had squash it was so so so so boring. kindaa.
cldnt drive the ball properly anymore.
the only source of entertainment was chatting w the other squashers (:

juin called just now and asked.
' do you wear gstring? '
i was totally stunned and then i recalled he received ck underwear from me and qx for his birthday.
THAT explains. teehee.

i think im quite dead jessie smsed to say that gp resource file is by TMR.
damn shitttt laah. ive only done like at most 5? and we need 30.
and i still have 18 CHINESE articles to cut.
tell me im dead meat or dead shit.

saw the vballers training when i went home. and i kinda miss the volley trgs.
cant fathom why i quitted then when i alrdy got used to the trgs and all.
shrugs? too late for anything now.
i'l just be a slacker heehee.

might be ponning gp and gsc tmr!
reason being the long break puts me off and im getting sick of schl ):
i know it's a bad thing to say but oh well.
see first lah. i enjoy going home EARLY nowadays.
to just slack and sleep and rest my tired soul.
i need to get my beauty sleep! to save my torn and tattered and lousy complexion.
blooopers.

i think i love youu (:

today's pe only had health talk and height and weight measurement of which the latter was cancelled in the end -.-
charlotte tang suddenly asked me to answer her about some gallstones thing!
stunned me.
oh and the rest of the free time for pe i ate chicken macaroni soup (:
cos i didnt eat breakfast specially for the height and weight thing, and the (very irritating) relief teacher was like.
' need to take height and weight MEH ' goshness i cldnt stand him and i was complaining to bobo the whole while. aurgh.

the rest of the day went by quite dry-ly.
oh during gsc lao shi was absent so i joined tingting and mel.
lysia sat w us too and we talked about random stuff. heehee.
and lysia and i were exchanging glances over smth q funny yet inconvenient to divulge.
teehee. glances do tell alot more than words ((:

after math tingting and i spent 20minutes deliberating over whether we should pon pw or not.
and when the bell rang we knew we'l pon in the end.
and so tingting called boongoon along to pon.
and grace joined boongoon HAHA.
ting boongoon and i went to venezia, grace had to go home cos she was sick.
ate yoggi (: nicenice.
then went to cold storage again!
where boongoon totally embarrassed herself when she happily exclaimed the MANGO tart of some sort was so nice repeatedly when it was PEACH -.-

then okay lahh i went home watched abit of some ch48 show and two episodes of FULLHOUSE.
goshness i think im damn lag. okay i know im damn lag.
but i only realised recently that full house is like, so nice lah.
im officially addicted to dramas of such genre. aaaah (:

okay lah byebye my gateau affairs gna start.
haha. tmr there's squash! (:
thurs there are plentiful free periods to play basket/volleyb!

i suddenly detest studying.
study so much also like no use. haiyoh.
terms are a demoralising bunch.
):

i miss seeing all the warm smiles around me.

遇上爱

this is like. majorly cute! (:
anyways.
today was fairly productive.
kindaa.
read a little of politiks package, tried to do some math but obviously cldnt figure out so i'l just hafta wait for the tutor to go through, did the assignment lao shi gave us.
ironed my clothes, no laundry to do.
yayye.

thinking about it still makes me angry and i wonder how im gonna face it in school but you know what. sometimes you just gotta learn to not give a damn about things.
so yep. im a haaaaaappy girl (:

had a delightful nap just.
cldnt resist, it was just THE weather to sleep in.

might get my pony shoes soon!
was looking at converse shoes ytd and my mum was like. might as well buy the pony ones.
teehee.
will go shopping on the coming friday/saturday/sunday.
and spend all i can! :D afterall you only get to do it once a year without guilt.

youmustbethinkingimhavingitgood.

i cant believe this and im losing grip of myself.
if there's one thing i hate it has got to be this.
and its making me so angry i swear i regretted being so civil.
maybe its good in the sense that it saves me from all the explanations.
i am so disappointed at the way you're taking things.
perhaps just as much as the way you're feeling after all that's been said.
i apologised, you refused.i guess there's nothing much thats left to be said.
if thats the way you're taking it, thats the way you choose to see things, thats the way you're dealing with it.
i wont bother salvaging what's already little of our perhaps already non-existent friendship.
more than friends. less than friends.
im really pissed in a way so calm that im spurting contradicting lines.
and so forgive me for my childish ways im just not ready to fit into your definition of an angelic, non-disgusting, non-assholic person.

kissgoodbye.

when life slows down and you manage to stop to take a rest, all the shit starts to come.
both literally and metaphorically :x
long time friends should know i have constipation which is really terrible hurhur.
and i really dont know how to deal w the tricky issues.
i try to make things clear lest it drags on and the other party gets even more hurt in the process.
but in the process of doing that i always receive a kind of unanticipated response that leaves me dumbfounded and even more guilty than ever.
and i think that really sucks.
guess that part of me hasnt grown up.
aaah, i'l just heck about it. life's too short for things like that.
at least i know ive tried my best.

so anyway.
i had a delightful meal at fishandco w xiaojie and melody after school ytd.
there was a halfday and miraculously i didnt skip ANY lessons.
aiyun and i dragged huizhen to math class cos that girl kept moaning about going home.
teehee.
so yeah we saw cherilyn at borders too and cherilyn melody and i got the same pencil tins from paperchase.
the very same pencil tin alina has and caught my attention hahaha.
great tastes we have (:

so, i did badly for gsc and huizhen owes me a meal for that.
the rest of the papers are on the way and i really hope i'l miraculously pass my chem/math.
either one of them will be enough cos i think i'l pass bio.
then i'l meet the minimum pass criteria :/

oh i bragged to THREE people about eating THREE ferrero rochers at one shot.
aiyun: wow?
xiaojie: wow?
melody: wow?
they just dont find it as significant an event as me -.-

i think half of fourone's at the skating rink now. lol.
maybe i'l go join them laters or smth?

to ben: CHEERUPS no matter what. okay?

:/

whaaaambam.
i saw the emo entry on qx's blog and suddenly i cldnt contain myself and i just burst i think.
and so i sent long mails to qx and ben.
okay la ben's one was shorter cos ie screwed and i definitely wasnt in the mood to like repeat every single detail once more.
and then i received ben's reply, as well as sms, both of which touched me alotalotalot that it brought tears to my eyes.
except that the mail was mildly irritating. teehee.
haiyohh you know i keep saying i should stop running away from stuff but i realise the more i say it the more i dont practise what i preach?
bummers.
breakfast tmr w xiaojie again! yay.
she's my littlemisshappy (:
i think im gna chop off my hair soon.
new haircut=new start. rightrightright?